08 August 2010

Party Rock

Roommate Ivor just woke me up in three ways: his car coming up the driveway, the tapping on all six of my windows, and his ringtone.

"SHOTS SHOTS SH-SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SH-SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS EVERYBODY!  The ladies love us, when we pour shots...

They need an excuse, to suck our..."

Me:  Hello?

Ivor:  Heeeeeey.

Me:  Are you locked out?

Ivor:  Yes.

Me:  Let me dress first.

So I stumble upstairs and quietly unlock the door because our other roommate Ross was also asleep.  We kept our voices to loud whispers.

Ivor:  Did y'all drink tonight?

Me:  Yes, do the empty beer bottles and bomb shot glasses not give it away?  How was Anchorage?

Ivor:  Good, I was banging this chick from eleven until about forty-five minutes ago.

Me:  I thought you drove to town to hang out with your buddy because your mutual friend just drowned in a lake.

Ivor:  I did, then I hooked up with the girl I've been texting.  [pauses]  Does that make me a slut?

Me:  Unequivocally.

Ivor:  At least I'm safe. [pulls out Trojans]

Me:  That's the important part.

2 comments:

  1. aww this reminds me of my college days!! And I love that song btw.. LMFAO is awesome!! Its like all I listened to while i was in florida and its the cd that broke my cd player in my car.

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  2. omg.. your roommate is a funny one. lol

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